Pet Peeves

I have a few, oh clients, how you amuse me.

1. When a john emails me and says 'I really like to (I hope you don't find this offensive, sorry) use my tongue shall we say...sorry' OF COURSE I DON'T FIND THAT OFFENSIVE. JEEZ. Would anyone find that offensive, well actually if a guy came up to me in a bar and said that I'd be like 'Um, okay...bit forward don't you think?' but this is my job, I get all sorts of emails that have many (many) details in them, and they're graphic details. I like it when a john know's this is what he wants from the booking, I'm not sure if all female escorts are like this though, I only talk to male one's so far...

2. When a john emails me and says 'Sorry I haven't contacted you in a while blah blah blah' I get to many emails to notice, in fact I usually have to go back through my inbox to see who you are, especially since so many guys are named Simon or Mark or John etc etc etc.

3. When I get a text from someone saying 'hey how are you?' I'm not here to chat with you mindlessly, get to the point. Or when they text me wanting to catch up and they don't give me any specifics, um like who they are would be nice to know.

Yes, I'm a little pissy, but I just got texts and emails with all this in them in the last hour.