Ashamed of your kink(s)?

I picked up a book I haven't read in a while, Kink by Stephanie Clifford-Smith, and started reading it again.

I remember when I bought this, I was 16 I think. I stopped into my local Dymocks Bookstore on the way home from school, I just love to peruse the isles of books, I can spend hours in a bookstore, literally getting lost in my own thoughts or conversations with other patrons.

The title attracted me, does everyone else find there eyes drawn to anything remotely sexual as mine are?

I picked it up and flipped to a random page to read a paragraph, instantly wanting to buy it. I took it to the counter to pay, the middle aged man gave me the slightest curious look. He was probably thinking something along the lines of 'Whats this pretty young girl in her school uniform uniform doing buying a book of this nature?' After reading it, it's nothing exceptionally kinky, really it's just the, dare I say, normal stuff.

Once the transaction was approved, he asked me:
"Would you like a bag so know one..." What? See's what I'm buying? Should I be embarrassed about the contents of this book? The clearly visible title and the picture? It's just a book for fucks sake.


"No thanks, I'll be right." I said quickly, in a calm tone with a polite smile, grabbing the book and receipt and walking out of the store.

I dislike it when people assume I should be embarrassed about something, I am rarely embarrassed, although it's not quite as rare for me to be embarrassing...or so I'm told.

Why are other's embarrassed of me? If anyone should be embarrassed it's me, I mean people aren't thinking "Why are those people with her? What freaks!" Their more thinking "That chick is a bit weird..."

I've always been different, I'm free-spirited.

In the wise words of Dizzee Rascal:

Some people think I'm bonkers
But I just think I'm free
Man, I'm just living my life
There's nothin' crazy 'bout me


Why should I be ashamed of buying a book about kink? I mean, if I bought a menacing looking (faux) leahter whip, yeah maybe I'd get a carry bag, but a book?